我的小天堂

bored and nothing to do...

2011-01-09T23:26:00.001+08:00

let's picture tells u everything...

skin worsen

2011-01-09T01:45:00.001+08:00

my complexion and pimples hot worsen!

sudden urge of the word "M" & "P"

2010-09-01T01:10:00.003+08:00

haha.... yup yup sudden i really hoping for the word "M" to come... and really wonders what will it be for mine.... especially the word "P" how would it turns out to be like.... will it be like a surprise??? be getting a flat? or just common agreement?? haiss....... was looking @ the videoson youtube.... really feel happy for those.. after seeing it... i really drop me tears=)how i wish germany is here to accompany me and maybe can live up to 5 more years!!! what i can do now is to give my ger ger all the best i can do!!!! germany!!! jie jie miss you!!!

baby zhen an... i really hope we can get the house!!! but i wishing for the surprises of project "P" coz i really wonder in future will it be a surprise... and i wishes someone could video it down as well... shall not think too much gonna go sleep... nights...

baby i love you.....

??

2010-06-24T23:33:00.002+08:00

i miss my bf now...
real miss...
wish that he could give me a hug now...

bu zhi dao wei she me gen ping shi de xiang nian shi bu tong de haha... wo shi sha le mahz.... ke shi wo xing li shi zhen de very xiang ta oh!

mood : SWINGING to P.M.S

2010-06-21T23:48:00.001+08:00

Superbly hate why there's still like 4 more days to Friday ....... mood SWING off totally... ultimate mood swing to the core... ignore me for these few days let me PMS... lucky this month falls on week days instead of week end if not will turns out to be a stubborn fight between me and BF....

my GOAL for july is to weighs less 5 kg........ JIA YOU!!!!

depths down to the black hole of mine

2010-06-21T23:11:00.003+08:00

it's been ultimate long that i hadn't been blogging over here.... I'm quiet upset over my baby boy... yes currently status emo.. sudden feeling of insecure is back... the feeling and thoughts of baby in the end wouldn't be mine..... haiss... no words can be described of what I'm feeling now... yes.... the words stressed is back in my dictionary towards my work and bgr state.... how i wonder if we could really settle down asap... but i know it couldn't be done...asap soon might be still in 3-4 years time but long 5-6 years or maybe 7 years....

anyway it's been 6 months since my boy germany had passed away... i still missed him alots.. wordless to describe how dept is the misses for me to him.. but definetly is the dead point if any ppl mention germany to me... hard is real pain... he's really my boy/son/or even brother to me... take cares of me... knows me well enough... the one and only.... germany i missses you tons......

okie jie jie gonna go rest...

updates!

2010-03-09T13:49:00.001+08:00

visit this http://jetaimecactus.tumblr.com/

shift over?

day 7 without germany around

2009-12-27T22:03:00.002+08:00

Today is the 7th day since germany passed away... last sunday was the day that germany had passed away. 20th december 2009 will always be the day that i will remember forever... ever though he's gone but he will be staying in my heart forever... no matter how sad or my heart is bleeding he will always be there...

germany jiejie miss you alots... there's no words i can bearly describe how much you weighs in my heart... ever since you are gone.... somehow a small tiny part of me also gone... whenever i bring gerger down for a walk i would turn my head around and think of those times when you were around... heart keeps aching non-stop then i realise last time whenever jiejie me got ditched by guys you always be there to keep jie jie accompany when i cried too much you would bark at me.... think back those times is never been as heart aching as now.....

to me ditch is nothing now but germany is everything..... whenever i really missed you i would look at your picture or sometime when nobody is around i would called gerger as you... tak to her like the way i talk to you... germany you know me very welll..... you know when to come in and look for me... you know when's the time i'm happy sad or angry... but now you ain't there anymore....

the house is getting much more quiet and less fun.... ever since you are gone... mom also very sianz and as usual without you around her nagging getting more and more and the frequency of quarreling is also higher chances or i should put it as percentage... last time with you around mama still can complain to you every single thing but now... can't already.... she also hardly talk to ah ger...

ah ni jie jie hao xing ku... thing back all thoses small little thing you can accompany me.... accompany me... everything it stays and never go... i really hope you can come back to here more often to visit us....

maybe i'm silly by saying all this childish stuff but this is wat my heart says and think be it or watever...

jiejie will move on and try to work harder towards everything... elthough now is only by verbal but one day jiejie will succeed i promise jie jie will....

ah ni everyone in the family misses you lots especially gerger... i can see her loneliness inside her.... ahni now whenever i'm at home gerger will stick by me.... sometimes i went infront of your picture there to look at you.... gerger also follow and does the same things as me... sit down there and stare at you together with me.... the image others people see already also heart break...

haiss... that day i should have stay at home then nothing would happen..... everything have to blame is still be me...... nevertheless i would be thinking of you forever... ah ni you and ah ger will be the dogs that i would ever raise up.... it's hard and pain went the day you left us...

my bf calvin sorry for this whold 7 days... put up lots of trouble for you....all i can say is sorry and thanks for trying to console me even you sounds abit pissed off.... but sometimes i really wish you could say nothing but just a slient hug will do..... all i want is very simple... but i'm thankful that you had been accompany me when ah ni is gone....

and bf i'm gonna thank you ever since 1st of dec... you understand that i'm really totally broke and you help me with tons of things help me pay this and that and even borrow me money.... i really don't know how to say but thanks....

i already lost my dearest and beloved ah ni which had been with me for 8 years whereby i treated him as my bro or son.... the day he parted from us... the day we got totally lost....

(in chinese) chian nian wan yu mei you yi ju hua wo ke yi biao da dui ni men de gan xie zhi you yi jui xie xie ke yi biao da gei ah ni he zhen an...

this is very long since i blog here.... and dunno when will i be coming back to blog again... with such a long post... =)

germany ni hui yi zhi zai wo de xing zhong de shen chun xia qu... wo ai ni

2009-04-06T03:31:00.000+08:00

http://desperadoxxxlady.blogspot.com/

my new blog add...

this blog is no longer in use... pls relink!!!!

2009-02-27T01:58:00.003+08:00

today was a tiring day.....

my supervisior long bang me till kallang den from there i took a bus home straight ... reach home first thing bath then dinner.. btw by the time i reach home it's 11 plus liao... and so... after dinner u can imagine wat time.. so after the dinner i started to pack my room and i decided to dump away the soft toy my 1st ex (dennis) gave... dunno why i just want to start dumping things into the trash bins... and for your info i just finsihed... it like 1.48am in the morning lahz.. power right... HAHA... =_="

secondly poor germany was sick ytd so today had to bring him to see the vet. and eventually i was working and can't make it.... thanks to my mom for helping me with this i really owned her alots...

thirdly i have come to a decision... and that is to del this blog away...

TOO MUCH EMO STUFF =)

and create NEW BLOG AND BRAND NEW TOPICS. about foods and shopping...

WILL try ALL my best to get that done by this MARCH....

OPENING SOON.. so STAY TUNE...

2009-02-26T00:58:00.002+08:00

okie these fews days of struggling, now i'm back to the lady and start to forget and re tolerate everything again and and and i'm silly to choose these paths... i'm real silly.. but still hoping one day he will change...

Even though knowing it will be like 10- 15% out of 100% i still wanna try it.....

i've nit much confident but worth to try as long as i don't give up....

2009-02-23T18:00:00.002+08:00

i guess he ytd when to some other girl house instead of simon bahz.... i'm tired.. i said nohing to him at all... dun wish to bother.... he dosen't really know how to love a person... this is wat i can say....

thanks josline... i did read ur tag but right now i dun wish to reply i got no mood for anything....

2009-02-22T07:44:00.002+08:00

looks like someone is missing in action again... i fucking hate those feeling... especially u hate those in the morning...

ytd i tried an error i purposely put me n him pic on msn and type forever... as i wanted to see will the person make noise or what.. so i guess it's true lohz... i never make a wrong move to check...

so now he must be talking to her on the line dat why keep pressing busy... i'm really like a fool.... why he must do that to me.... and i really f'ing deserve this type of treatment???

i honestly rather he be honest to me... but i guess pretty well one thing... even though he know how to write and read the word honest but he's not bahz... i'm totally speechless for eveything...

even guys will also cover for guys... i getting sick over this... freaking sickening....

2009-02-19T22:42:00.003+08:00

i'm really tired of everything.. from ytd night when i was eating my food happily half way i saw the msg my appetite gone straight... today whole day no appetite... at night what i saw.... the time table sheet on the desk... out of curiosity i flip it open up to see... den i realised tuesday someone told me his working till next day morning... but in the end what happen i saw

khws TUESDAY 5pm - 11pm

so he came back on wednesday 5+am so in between where he goes? and that was the day he n guoguo got back... so wat am i to him.... out of sudden everything collapse onto me... i feel so terrible that i partially gone numb....

is this a joke or wat?

i dunno..

wat guo guo told me... i listen and think for one day... and not say that i dunno khws well. but i still know partially... i'm really speechless fro a guy that can treat womans as nothing like just a pieces of tissue.... or perhaps... i'm just another stepping stones....

why things starts to happen when i finally made a decision to be a good girl... why i dunno...

want to blame u can only blame i'm stupid and silly for begin a fool... all i know is just to keep it deep down inside me.. let myself suffer.....

all i want is khws to be sincere n faithful is that diffcult.

ONLY one LOVE and no more others....

IS THAT THAT HARD?

i believe in guoguo words but i do want to trust him... but to times he's destroying every single things he bulid to make me TRUST.

i'm not ANGRY but upset with myself to conintue knowing wat type of person he is...

trying to quit smoking... this 3 to 4 days haven't touches at all...

A fewdays ago i was really hapy with my heart as we plays games and catches the softtoy together but now.....

everything has happen within ytd n today ... I lost every single thing...

anyway he doesn't really cares that much... for what why should i bother where he don't even cares...i really feel terrible... it realy hurts... all i do is to hide inside my room cry and feel miserable all by my own...

lucky enough i'm not like the past me that bgr things will drag my career down... i stil continue to work... but by wearing a mask... today i dun wish to sit with wendy instead i wish to be alone so i move to sit with rachel... as she very quiet and today i really feel like to have a peace in my ears no complain for these period of time... i'm wanna have a peaceful ears, a comfort zone to be...

why can't he give me peace by not coming out so many problems. i'm really tired with all sort of nonsense.... pain in the neck...

feel like going to park again...

whether is alone or with him around....

now cannot finsh mom food had to wait till them sleep therefore i can wash my plates.... ate a few mouth of beehoon and the ingredient.. lucky got 2 dogs to help me with that....

this morning wake up den notice that i sprain my neck last night.. due to comfort sleeps... i keeping getting awake... up down up down....

是我不好吗？

还是你又回到了原点！！！

现在不管这样我都会走下去。。。

如果他对我是真的真心。。。

应该中有一天我会看和感觉到的。。。

可是现在我也累了。。。。。

really tired of eveything...

2009-02-18T23:12:00.001+08:00

wat am i to him?

i'm really speechless to say anything.... why is he doing this.... happily came home to rest but in the end what is this..... msn on.... wow terrific...... what a good msg to see.......

i'm just too speechless....

2009-02-15T23:47:00.002+08:00

found a number on the table.... i guess proberly he starts again... i'm speechless towards everything.... but all i can do is to deceive myself to trust him... see him everyday with a fake smile... i love him but to the extend things he done.. is totally out of my expect... haiss.... what to do ... who ask me to love him.....

i'm tired of everything.... real tired.... but everything is beyond saving... can i really save everythign up.. why last time when i'm realy in a relationship stuff i can dun go club and drink but now... i still continue..... i want to push myself back to the past.... i really wanted.... but if he's a normal guy that will be good enough.... i felt terrible...

2009-02-11T23:25:00.002+08:00

heart is bleeding so much that i hardly catches anything in my mind...

happy times only last for a while...

sad times last forever...

all i want is just for you to know...

this period of time i really need you the most...

i'm too scare of evrything happens in feb...
i hate FEB.
i hate VALENTINE.
i hate them deeply in my heart.

FEBis use to be a day that i always dream for begin happy now has become a NIGHTMARE.

you must work hard.... i wa wondering... during march could i go over to penang with him.. if he agrees... but i highly doubt so...

2009-02-09T03:54:00.003+08:00

out of sudden i feel like cryin now... not because of current him but the past him... coz i never ever forget or put him away... he's still inside me... tell me how to take him off of really hide him deeply inside me... heart is pain... real deep pain... he's already gone with another girl... time flies.... it's gonna be a year soon... but he's really the one who hurts me most.... there's really too much things had left to be unsaid... and too much things to be hidden forever...

i love the current one but he can never ever replaced the past one...

things i wanted and everything the current cannot give... will this last... i dun even dare to think... not as in cash and everything but all i wan is just a sincere and a faithful heart towards me only... but it all can't be given... how you would really expect me to totally focus on him...all i want is just want a guy to love with all his heart...

no one really know how i actually gone thru this one whole year.... no one... who i can do is to drink and get myself drunk to pass everyday... but things got slightly better when i got to know the current one... he taught me alotx of things... and i learned things in him...

2009-02-08T08:18:00.001+08:00

i din know that take car back can took ppl an hour.. how smart to say this... i'm not dumb.... still have to act as nothing happen before...

2009-02-07T09:23:00.004+08:00

alright i had to say this i really vey SICK...

HEAVY FLU and started to cough already...

ate nothing but out of sudden SICK...

having migraine now..

and now feel frustrated...

hmm.. looks like someone got new stuff... wondering which girl brought it for him...

NECK CHAIN OR WHAT!!!

whatever i don't wanna care anymore...

uncle asking me to china work liao..

hesitating...

AND I'M FUCKING BROKE!!!!

DREAMS....

2009-02-06T02:23:00.002+08:00

on wednesday is a perfect night for me... why i said so... coz someone actually wait for me after work.. gosh! i feel something about it.. seriously i really felt it... but to times... i reallyt think both of us won't have something in future... but to times.. i felt nothing...

RIGHT NOW!!!

i'm watching show.. called the bride wars... out of sudden i had the crush to get married too.. but who... haiss i guess had to drop the idea of getting married again.. haha... in future i want something is like so so so grand and romantic that everyoes envy.. haha .. i guess that's what everygirls want....

but i also want my partner to love me too...

okie... stop dreaming topic ends... had to get back to reality...

Life is just like that...

i want SALES &&& a simple simple simple plain kenny that's all i asked for... hope it not too much....

2009-02-01T15:30:00.002+08:00

feb finally arrives...

hmm.... what's next gonna happens... i hardly remember wat happen to me ytd.... first i know i went out to Rebel den back to the orgin place next i can't remember anythhing.... but i'm pretty sure... i forget to take my bag... and why am i outside throwing things.... zzz... i think things that i really do is making one to get piss...

solution is stop eveything i'm doing back to square one and BE MYSELF.

As times slowly FLIES. i begin to know and understand every single things... out fo sudden i feel like going back to study again. at least it suits me more...

2009-01-29T23:37:00.002+08:00

29 Jan 2009 is the worst day ever...

LOST MY HTC TOUCH which is less than a month old...

NO SALES FOR WORK...

LOST MONEY IN GAMBLING...

FUCK IT!!!!

DAMN FREAKING PISSED OFF TO THE MAX...

2009-01-29T05:47:00.000+08:00

i F'ing spoil my fone.....

MY HTC TOUCH!!!!

KNN that perosn tsk,p

2009-01-28T09:56:00.002+08:00

going off work liao....

SIANZ ARHZZZ!!!

ARGH!

WORK!!!

NEW YEAR
NEW PROSPECT
NEW TARGET
NEW SALES
NEW LIFE

HUAT ARHZ!!!

2009-01-28T03:30:00.003+08:00

today went to guoyang house...

eat steamboat n play card games...

den headed to k songs...

i misses him...
today we nvr coontact for one whole day...

okie just finished done the fone called with eeling...

so i really can't control myself to call him... so i did and he did pick up... oh wells... he looks like he's having fun over at his hometown... whereby i'm like damn lonely here... how i wish he's with me right now...but right now he's enjoying his lovely PENANG prata... and i'm like starving over here... oh wells feels good for him.... okie i feel a bit better now well at least he pick up his fone so i'm okie with it.... later someone gonna perform his flairing at PENANG and where by i have to work....... FUCKING SIANZ.....

even knowing that my heart can't really rest down peacefully when he's in sg more is like much more worst... but for god sake...right now the feeling is like totally CMI... but i guess i can pass it thru... i hopefully one day miracle would falls on me...
and hopefully he'll be the one... i dun mind to work harder to earn more... but just hoping that's all....

and i guess i gonna go sleep so... nights...

working....
这样就满足了。。。

2009-01-27T00:07:00.002+08:00

finally i just reach home... As usual first stop to tampines den to yishun, khabit,angmokio,bishan lastly to serangoon.... today still had to go but i guess i will be staying at home. why coz lazy n tired.... tml noon time going to GUOYANG HOUSE!!!! wahaha.... good?

anyway, i guess he reached penang le bahz.... yup.... but the last msg i send him was 6+pm on the 26/01/2009 and i just called him on 00.07am (27/01/2009). Guess what as i expected. Never pick up his bloody fone lahz... zzz... got others ppl and his family will be good liao... all i want is for him to let me know that he reach there safetly only that's all dun ask for much.. but.... haiss sad to say.... it just happen the way i think....

2010 my another cousin is getting married.. gonna be emcee again... why always me.... is it because i'm too noisy??? dotx.... LoL....

anyway 2009 there's 2 friends and a cousin getting married... so meaning got dinner again... wahaha... =)))

AND AND AND

THE STINGY ONE AS USUAL NEVER GIVE ANGBAO FOR FREAKING TEN YEARS STILL CARRY HER CHILDRENS OVER TO GET ANGBAOS... DAMN IT!!! I SWEAR I NEXT YEAR HAVE TO GET IT FORM HER OR AT LEAST SUAN OR SHOOT HER BACK GIVE HER SOME LESSONS...

p.s man is devil, woman is worst den a devil, lady is gone

2009-01-25T18:11:00.002+08:00

hmm... looks like someone is gone... As in gone back to penang, so i guess had to see him next sat already... dun wish to think too much already... haha... =] this year no reunion dinner for me... coz my family dinner starts at 5pm while i off work @ 5pm... BORING!!! so i go club tonight?

HUAT ARH!!! HUAT ARH!! HUAT ARH!

2009-01-25T01:30:00.003+08:00

out of sudden i think back last year this time this period... when i was still with him... den tears sudden rolled down to my cheeks... Heart still continue to bleed and it doesn't stop... till now to be honest i can't really get him off my chest.... =(((((((((((((((((((

it's not good and not healthy...

but this is also good for my current one too.. at least i won't throw in my whole heart and everythign... but that doesn't mean the current one doesn't have a stand in my heart he has... but maybe same as him like where i stand in him...

and so i consider that a fair stand.... neother both or us are walking to the point had no return... As long as i'm well behave i'm as good as per normal... =)))

just now sfter work went to colleague place to bbq the bbq pork known as "BA GUA" and some sausages...haiss.. i'm freaking tired.... but stil had to pack my room and i'm working tomorrow yeti still hate to pack... tired... =((((

5k more to go... pls god let me hit my target... this is wat i only ask for.... =(((((((

CNY coming....

HUAT ARH

19th jan 09 @ double O

2009-01-24T03:15:00.004+08:00

19th jan 2009

Went to Double O.

will upload some pic @ a later time..

2009-01-23T23:44:00.002+08:00

how i wish one could really change to a good guy aka good bf...

but i honestly knew that the day would never come... Every now and then i would just pray and hope that day would come.... even he said i never take number, to be honsetly i dun believe... a leopard cannot changes it's spot... as for me i never bothers any more... but when i heard he gonna moves to his so call "MANAGER " place my facial expression changes straight...

brain thinking "manager or WHAT" maybe just another so called charbo... haha... sianz... everyone does know who's KHWS is if they are in thoses night life stuff.... me haha i dun even cares.. i just wan him to be a good typical guy that all dun ask for much...

and i told not to told about ONES' i mean this isn't fair ... as this is my F'ing blog so i have the f'ing right to blog about any thing..... later den edit his picture

2009-01-23T23:26:00.003+08:00

out of sudden while watching some video clips my tear rolls down to my cheek... images flashes across me again like the past of what L said before... this post will not post out... if not i'll be damn miserable.... in fact i know right now for wat am i doing is all rubbish but stil i still had to thanks to hws... right now he's my boi also acc me teach me this n that....

2009-01-22T18:36:00.001+08:00

seriously i have a big big big question in mind...

how to make ur guy stay with you?

as in will last...

disappointment is wat one's always give

fuck up night (draft)

2009-01-19T03:33:00.004+08:00

what did i actually do wrong or say wrongly... i know one's practicing and the last words i was telling ones i think when i was video'ing the process for the last one i think i did doze off... and ones ask me want to eat noodle a not... in fact i dun really feel like eating lohz... but i assume ones is hungry so i just ask like ones who cook nia got fault mehz..... sianzz... everyting my fucking fault lahz...like i'm always begin the ones to be blame...fuck

now can;t even blog on my own personl fucking blog

sunday ROTs?

2009-01-19T01:05:00.002+08:00

omg today i just make sales and had to split with my colleague oh well at least i get a sales beter than nothing... tired!!! seriously i dunno why i really had no mood for CNY... that's makes me the sianz part...

NOW DOING SOME TIMING THINGYS... i just giving my opinion that's all... end up what... somehow i'm like kanna lecture like that... better still i won't give any suggestion anymore.. i'll just keep my mouth shut lohz better still right!!! @ LEAST i won't got lectured by SOME OTHER PEOPLE OUT THERE....

dun talk abt that.. i'm freaking tired....

IT'S TIME FOR LANGUAGE LEARNING SESSION...

put your tongue in the mole.
(Philpino Language)

meaning fuck you in philipino language...

haha

So guys dun try to use it in front of them it's a very very evry extremely rude to say to them......

mymanar

na ni koo chi te

meaning

i love you

2009-01-18T02:01:00.001+08:00

today i made a good sales...

haha.. tired...

going back to sleep again...

happy lohz... first time in my life ever close 3 deals in a days though it isn't much but still i'm happy enough!!!!

2009-01-17T09:13:00.001+08:00

haiss everymorning had something to whin is sianz de...

i had something to say but dun feel like bloggin it out now.. as i just wan to make sure something maybe wait and see first how does it goes...

2009-01-17T00:05:00.003+08:00

Nowadays i'm seriously tired...

morning go work...
after work home...

EAT, SLEEP, GO WORK

see how healthy am i? OMFG!!!

19, 20 is drawing near duno how is the training n practices goes.. hopefully it goes off well... hopefully he can gets what he wants...

anyways it's a FRIDAY night why am i @ home!!! i'm so pathetic... LoL....

today @ work i did close a sales but thanks to ron if it wasn't him... i might end up no slaes again.. but again they just put deposit.. so have to jolly well wait for them to come back first... so yup!!! good at least i tried... i had to be more hardworking... =)))

going off to sleep first.....pathetic

melon vs melon

2009-01-16T01:53:00.001+08:00

seriously i gonna blog something now..

R21 pls

this is the one i see lioa... was a OUCH! and SPEECHLESS....

melon vs melon on muchosucko.com

http://www.muchosucko.com/show/52611

2009-01-15T09:45:00.001+08:00

i'm a bit pissed off to be serious...

i never go read ppl msn liao... but someone look at my msn and read it.... FuCk!!! PISSED OFF to e CORE.....

cafe del ma

2009-01-14T09:32:00.002+08:00

wahaha!!! i HEART skinny!!!!

me & kenny... we ARE ACTING CUTE... who will win???

i simply in love with this pic.. coz i looks "CHIO". LoL... am i right!!! wahaha postive thinkers

2009-01-14T09:11:00.002+08:00

have something to whin again...

sorry folks if u dun wan emo stuff pls get the hell out of here...

nowadays working all day long...

seldom go club le...

As days goes, disappointment is build.

it's getting heavier n heavier.

Loads is pilling up.

I appreciated the cleaning of my room...

but somehow..

i feel i'm begin use...

need things than hug me and all sorts of things...

like example, this morning came home 5 plus all the way sitting right in front of the com. throw me aside see how good you are. i guess u never even bother about ppl feeling... haiss...

As for me i also changed, now i'm a walking human without any feeling liao. i guess... i do really seem to bother that much... and getting crazy n crazy....

things are proving me wrong already yet you choose to think that you are right though things are also getting more on my nerves but i gonna forshake it...

seriously needed a person to allow me to see future... but currently my future is not to be seen...

what i can do know is just to support you on your job n ur interest.
lastly just hoping for mircale to happen

2009-01-13T09:00:00.002+08:00

OKIE RECENTLY I'M REALLY REALLY TIRED &&& STRESS...

gonna die soon...

my msn contact all gone.. working time i feeling like zzz.... what you guys think... that's show i'm freaking TIRED!!! LoL....

Leng & Shan wait till i got time i will try to flood back to shan blog... wahhaa... leng i shall niam you...leng & shan is P.I.G

P ig
I s
G reedy

so does shan n leng...

fishy arhz... not i dun wan to to meet or chat with you i got no time le... once i got time i will go find you okie... dun angry....

2009-01-10T02:45:00.001+08:00

OMG!!!

my msn contact all lost!!!!

DEL it ACCIDENTALLY THRU MY FONE... BLOODY SHIT!!!

EVERYONE PLS DO RE ADD ME AGAIN @

ah_ling 286@hotmail.com

PLS DO HELP ME A FAVOUR!!!!!!!! SORRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-01-09T00:06:00.002+08:00

today it seems like a sucky day for me... one f'ing whole day i was thinking is he goign out with girls or really going out for his cocktail thingys... i dunno tonight i really got the f'ing urge to go zirca as quite a number of ppl calling n texting me... life sucks when u actually promised someone not to go... F'UP!!! wth wat's wrong with me why i must f'ing listen to him.. just bcoz i'm in love with him or there a reason behind it... i guess that was the f'ing reason bahz... i'm not listening for the seek of listen.... sweat...

i guess my blog is for me to whin... haha... sweet...

khws can i demand more things from you...

2009-01-08T10:19:00.002+08:00

i'm upset due to him... haiss... he's still keeping things from me.. but why... watever liao... he wants me to listen to him den he should also prove something to me too...

friendster 2 private photo wonder which CHABOR again...

later going out @ 2pm also dunno go where maybe meeting chabo again...

days has seem to be much more n more to let me go tired.....

2009-01-04T20:41:00.001+08:00

Recently there's too many things happened.

i feel gulity over something especially when the accident happens...

all my fault...

2009-01-02T09:11:00.001+08:00

i guess i can't guess go any where easy spotted... kns... kanna caught...

the words of the lies

2009-01-02T05:22:00.002+08:00

today after work went to wine connection to drink den follow on meet up with my buddy for supper...

haiss...

he's not in sg...

was msn'ing with him just now...

now facebook chat lohz..

haiss... how i feel... mom getting married... nvm... den next say tml not coming back... den next say mom sleep beside him... i really wonder who's sleeping beside him... for wat i know.... he told me she nvr go... but why out of sudden i feel that there's loops holes in his words again....

i even got the feeling that she's sleeping right beside her... but the foundations of his words is not in sequences... u tell me how to cover it up... but will try hard to cover up.... haiss just another silly girl to be...

TIRED!!!

HAPPY 2009

2008-12-31T22:27:00.001+08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR

EVERYONE LET'S FORBID TO 2008

AND

WELCOME 2009!!!!!

Anyway i'm still sick coughing as usual... haha... =X

My 2009 new year resolution

-EARN MORE $$$
-SAVE MORE $$$
-MORE SALES PLEASE!!!
-TARGET 2010 MUST BUY A CAR...
-GO HOLIDAYS WITH MY LOVE ONES...

PLACES TO GO
-THAILAND (2009)
-HONGKONG
-KOREA
-JAPAN
-EUROPE
-MALACCA(2009)
-TAIWAN(2009)
-BALI&PHUKET&RENDANG(2009)

***EACH MONTH MUST EARN 3K AND ABOVE***

MORE BR AND GUEST NEEDED...

=)

WISH ALL MY LOVES ONE GOOD YEAR AHEAD AND WISH COME TRUE...

******FWSILYTFET******
CODING OVER HERE

MY WHINNINGS

2008-12-30T00:52:00.002+08:00

i dislike the feeling of seeing him sms in front of me... all i can think is negatively.... why would i feel that coz i'm lagging of alotx of security feeling.... doesn't mean can see him 24 hours means got security feeling... is the person been doing what....

ACTIONS SPEAKS LOUDER THAN WORDS...

is just like

A PICTURE TELLS YOU A MILLIONS OF WORDS...

i bet some ppl understand me...

BUT THAT WILL BE ALWAYS SOME PPL DON'T...

HONESTLY I DON'T TRUST ONE'S WORDS AT TIMES...
COZ THERE'S TOO MANY LOOPHOLES FOR ME TO COVER IT UP FOR HIM....

WHEN DID I COVER IT UP... example... there's a loop holes over there... u saw it.... but u just simply get a thing to cover it up....

right now the places i'm stand is all about the things... yi bu xiao xing i will drop into the holes... and that's will consider as self buried... LoL... better save money for my coffins... haha....

was it a long long long long long long long long long long post.......

and a long long long long long long long long long long long whins of MINEZ... wahaha... that's alll for tonight....

GOOD NIGHT!!!!

2008-12-29T09:09:00.002+08:00

a week work 6 days... everyday saw him but it slowly seems like no topics within us anymore...he don't seems to feel it too... or maybe he does... he just simply choose to remain in slient... haiss wat can i do or say... i don't know anymore... everyday i just knkow go work... every sunday monday n tuesday i juat wanna rush home to see him or i should say i wan to acc him or he acc me.. that's all... wed to sat he working... i working too mahz... so you think we had plenty of time ... HAHA i doubt so...

that's all for today....

GD Morning everyone...

HAVE A NICE WEEK AHEAD.
(NO MONDAY BLUE FOR EVERYONE)

2008-12-28T23:19:00.002+08:00

Lately there's somthing running in my mind.. what's is it really about? i don't know... perhaps i know but i just dun want to blog it over here.... but on day i wil blog it out... one day when the day it suppose to be out here... haha....

jessie congrat u found ur way here... RE-LINK ME!! wahaha... =)

2008-12-28T08:20:00.002+08:00

wah i just wake up i have been sleeping for 16 hours since i came back...

still coughing badly...

no voice... argh!!!

going off work... bb

thousands years million words...

2008-12-27T09:02:00.002+08:00

ytd was the ever first night out of so long...
i stay out late & nvr sleep...
going for work soon...

tonight i shall then blog i got lots n lots n lots of things to say...

haiss...

Life is just as bad as S.H.I.T

2008-12-25T23:33:00.002+08:00

HoHoHo!~

MERRY CHRISTMAS

EVERYONE

i wish everyone had their dreams come true... and God will bless them.

==================================================================

i brought something for one. i hope he likes it... haha... and i hope he would treasures it too... though it not very exp to wat i thought but i believe it's the heart that counts...

Brought a mug for my mom too...

thanks manger(cheryl) for the cup thanks terence(supervisior) for the chocolate...

i guess this x'mas i have been a very good girl indeed. why? as this x'mas eve n x'mas i've been staying at home rot... never go out... not even to club... one ask me to stop going clubbing... yesh!~ In fact i'm happy to heard this... WHY!~ dun ask me... (i'm not begin pyscho or whatever alright!!! i just have the thought of begin care...) maybe the care of what i want is this way bahz... okie i hate to say this but i had too... i'm crazy or insane... i love begin control by my loves one okie... zzzzz.....

==================================================================

Dear Santa,

this year what i wish for is for one to love me trully,honestly and the most wanted is love me only... coz i want to be the one n only in his heart place in him...

==================================================================

knowing this could be the impossible of the impossible. but i just wanna continue and hoping for changes... though my heart is cracking bit by bits i still wanna put hope in him...

KHWS i hope i never put wrong trust & hope in you...

==================================================================

Tagged by JOSLINE

Questions:

If you have been tagged in this, write the names down of the first 21 people you can think of (no repeats), and then answer the questions. Say you’re guessing if you don’t know, but at least guess on all of them. After doing this, tag your 21 friends to do the same.

1.Joy
2.QianHui
3.Yvonne
4.Zhiyang
5.Shihui
6.May
7.Yiling
8.GuoYang
9.Jessie
10.Joanna
11.Waileng
12.QiaoPing
13.Stella
14.Jiamin
15.Peggy
16.Sihan
17.Sebastian
18.Hinyong
19.Freddi
20.Guohua
21.kenny

*How did you meet 7?
ans: working.

*What would you do if you had never met 15?
ans: i think i will be missing alots of fun as she taught me quite a number of things in my life. it'll be a sad thing if i never meet 15 before.

*What would you do if 20 and 1 dated?
ans: i'll be in real STUNNED... real as they dun even know each other existence...

*Have you ever seen 17 cry?
ans: Not Really!

*Would 4 and 16 make a good couple?
ans: hmm... nope i dun think so.. eh! Height maybe a problem liao...

*Do you want to be 13's friend forever?
ans: YESH! Definetly she's a great n kind n friendly friend to be.. we hits off well ever since the first day we knew each other...

*Do you think 11 is attractive?
ans: YesH! Especially her curve and curly hair makes her looks SEXY!!! @___@"

*What’s 5’s favorite color?
ans: Her closet is full of BLUE, BLACK shirts, so what you think....

*When was the last time you talked to 9?
ans: Long time... on fone... 3 weeks back...

*What language does 8 speak?
ans: English/Chinese/Hokkien( i assume )

*Who is 13 going out with?
ans: Don't know! it's fo rme to know it's for you to find out YOURSELF.

*What grade is 16 in?
ans: what garde i dun understand....

*Would you ever date 17?
ans: he has a GIRLFRIEND.even though he doesn't we are like bro n sis no chemistry between us...

*Where does 18 live?
ans: Hougang

*Have you ever kissed 2?
ans: YESH! why not.. it's normal for girl to kiss each other...

*What’s the best memory you have of 5?
ans: When we are @ bitc hostel.the weird n funny things she did first time...

*When’s the next time you’re going to see 4?
ans: When both of us is free...

*How is 7 different from 6?
ans: one young like 12 this year another old like 20 this year... so u see the DIFFERENCE.

*Is 2 pretty?
ans: YESH! of course...

*How did you meet 3?
ans: ITB.

*Is 15 your best friend?
ans: not so called as best friend but good friends...

*Do you hate 12?
ans: why should i hate my kaki for clubbing...

*Have you seen 18 in the last month?
ans: yupyup!

*When was the last time you saw 16?
ans: 2-3 months.

*Have you been to 5’s house?
ans: nope.

*When’s the next time you’ll see 10?
ans: not sure.

*Are you close to 11?
ans: Yesh! somehow...

*Have you been to the movies with 4?
ans: yup! with our friends.

*Have you gotten in trouble with 8?
ans: I doubt so.

*Would you give 19 a hug?
ans: nope.

*When have you lied to 3?
ans: no one is perfect, everyone L.I.E.S

*Is 11 good at socializing?
ans: hmm, soso lohx!

*Do you know a secret about 8?
ans: ehh, perhaps.

*Describe the relationship between 12 and 18.
ans: nothing.

*What’s the best thing about your friendship with 9?
ans: things happened at BITC

*What’s the worst thing about 6?
ans: too noisy!

*Have you ever had a crush on 12?
ans: eH! No! SIAO! SHE"S ANOTHER KAKI of MINEZ.

*How long have you known 2?
ans: Ever since poly year 1 so what you think.

*Have you ever been in a fight with 13?
ans: Nope. why should i?

*Does 11 have a bf/gf?
ans: yesh! WX lohz...

*Have you ever wanted to punch 1 in the face?
ans: I wouldnt do it to my bestie sis

*Has 21 met your mother?
ans: yup.

*How did you meet 11?
ans: NYP

*Did you ever accidentally physically hurt 3?
ans: yesh! fencing training.

*Do you live close to 7?
ans: yup! very somemore.

*What is 8’s favorite food?
ans: i think stay or chix wings due to supper time.

*What kind of car does 1 have?
ans: Volkswagen New Beetle Cabriolet

*Have you traveled anywhere with 9?
ans: Yup! BEIJING

*If you gave 14 $100, what would he/she spend it on?
ans: i don't think she will accept it too...=)

MERRY CHRISTMAS

2008-12-23T22:23:00.005+08:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS

=================================================================

Another day passed...

Tml night is christmas eve... and hurray i'm off on christmas eve... where am i planning to go.. i guess no where... why?

reason: i'm sick and broke and

I'M WORKING ON CHRISTMAS DAY

guys it's christmas..

have you brought anythinG FOR YOUR LOVE ONES...

OH WELL THIS year i didn't really brought anything neither for myself too...

this was the ever first time i feel so damn freaking broke... LoL...

i didn't even brought anything for my precious doggie this year... gona start earning more money as soon as possible =================================================================

i dunno how to answer my fren when they ask me a question with am i attach or not... why... As one nvr give me a stable RS feeling... I'm afraid once i answered in the end gone i have to say i'm back to single again... so i dun wan ppl to know why i like changing bf... it's always happen that.. i gave ppl a thought i'm the one who flirt around that's why in the end they are gone... but to the true it's not me okie..... IF ONE DAY EVER EVER EVER HAPPENS TO GIVE ME AN ANSWER OR FEELING THAT THIS IS A STABLE RS... i will hoestly tells everyone i'm attach or wat.. but now dun know bahz... dilemma state...

Now one is sitting right in fornt of me playing guitar... i'm enjoying the songs now... =))) i like to see the time when he's serious into something that expression... i love that expression of him... how i wish he's a good boy, 好情人 and 好男人。。。 but maybe in this world this type of guys hAD already die... or gotten by others ppl le bahz...

can i left A GOOD GUY like that for me... i will treasure... but that guy must be someone i like... like him can u change him for me...

angelawu: GLL stop dreaming already.... the more u dream the more u will get hurt...

=================================================================

fishy thanks for today help... i owned u alots.........=) i will tc of myself de okie...

WORDS THAT HAVE SAID

2008-12-22T19:40:00.003+08:00

Just got to know that one is going back...

Even though deep down inside my heart has millions,billions of reluctant of letting him to be back... but i told myslef... this time go back anything happen i won't bothers anymore...

As what will happens will eventually happens de... and yesh i will always think of the negative side as to prevent myself from gettting that hurt...

Message to one

I will try alll my best to trust u regardless of anything gonna happen or not... but u just don't leave any single tracks for me to find out that's all...

=================================================================
i think i'm really dying soon.. today had been staying @ home one whole day...
Fever Fever Fever

CHRISTMAS IS COMING...

SANTA'CLAUS IS COMING TO TOWN..

2008-12-21T22:43:00.002+08:00

As days passed...

More disappointment was builded..

out of sudden i feel for today was totally... haiss.. i din really know wat to say...
Came back home... first things open the door wat i saw was fone ringing & as usual nvr pick up again.... msg msg msg..... then tell me all lots of reasons... so day n day passed instead of trust is building, ones build me with curious & reason for not trusting him... but i tried to tone it down...

i'm getting tired as days passed.

coz all i want from ones is a true sincere n only one heart to 1 person only... am i really asking too much...

Every little single things one said n did, it affect a hell lots to me... why coz i love him...

Seriously n honestly all i want from ones today is at night at least stay at home acc me for tonight... as he also knows that our timing for working doesn't tele anymore... haiss... speechless!!! i also feel that ones has started to neglect me...

Right now i feel sad &&& heart is already bleeding but i still continue... I HAVEN'T GIVE UP YET.... FROM NOW ONWARDS I WON'T say it out anymore... but i'll blog it out...

when will the day come when ones will never ever hide his fone n allow me to view?

Does ones knows i'm waiting for that day to come...

2008-12-20T09:34:00.002+08:00

i have want to do i had already done my part. Buy breakfast for the next day i done... morning wake up called asked him one thing where u... mac.. okie... (tat period of time i forgot i got bread for myself...haha... stupid plus everything...)

i'm silly to buy so many bread totally stupid...

i had to leave my place @ 0930 for work...

but till now i'm still home... why... waiting for ONE to be home... u dunno how piss off am i???

and i miss count my days of fever... today is actually the sixth day of fever..

mid-night and this morning fever AGAIN....

ya i still had to drag myself to work... why.... coz $$$$$

recently i'm getting more n more $$$ tight...
why.... perhaps i know the reason but just wanna diam diam...

haha... GLL song bo?

answer: YESH LAHZ... SONG...(*siao)

good luck today.... angela wu.... jia you!!! liling n her friends loves n dote u the most....

2008-12-19T23:51:00.005+08:00

1.

Title: I Love Thee With An Everlasting Love
Strong, shared faith brings so many couples together. This loving pair become ever closer as they pray, hand-in-hand, for a blessed future together.

2.

Title: Together Is The Nicest Place To Be
When you love someone, there's no place you would rather be than right beside them. Share this loving sentiment with your significant other. This figurine features a couple cuddled up on the couch with pillows and their little kitten and puppy by their sides.

3.

Title: Happily Ever After...
With her rufflely, flowing gown and their shimmering, jewel-encrusted crowns, this couple is sure to live "Happily Ever After"! The enchanting mood of this piece is sure to inspire thoughts of your own fairy-tale wedding, or spark memories of the one shared with your own Prince Charming.

4.

Title: From This Day Forward
This elegant figurine captures not only the splendor of the special day, but also the life-long pledge of commitment to each other. The fine detail in the bride's dress is an exquisite touch matched by the handsome tailoring of the groom's morning coat. This is a figurine that will be treasured by any newlywed couple, well into their golden years!

normally girls/ladies would want to be in sequence goes like 1,2,3,4

but for me...

i dun ever ever think till that far....

all i wish for is for 1 & 2 to happen that's all i wanted... to some ppl may think it's must be easy but it's must be tough too...

ESPECIALLY TO PPL THAT DON'T KNOW WHO HAS BEEN TREATING HIM THE BEST...

or i should put it this way...not exactly the best but will try her best to do everything just for "A"person

guess wat i edit the background again... i think it's sweet enough!!

hehe is normal but i simply love it....

i honestly want to go back to my old self... is all about simplicity.... i hate the enviroment around us... that changes me to be that complicated... i just want to that simple... headache fever ... everything is spinning i really feel like crying already... haiss go sleep le...

BROKE in health + wealth

2008-12-19T02:18:00.002+08:00

i'm totally dried... for everything

that's include my health+wealth...

having 5 days of HIGH FEVER already... can fever up tp 12 hours or slighty more... den chilled for around 1 hour den back to fever again...

recent alotx of missed call n everything...

i nvr get the chance for that... as i had been lying on this bed for 5 whole days...i just make it to 6 days instead...

did i eat.... yesh.... but thrown out each n everysingle of it....

no appetite... see doc le
eat medicine liao.. still the same....

2008-12-17T23:55:00.002+08:00

even though i know so many things...
but in the end i ended up to self deceiving mode again....

how do i actually feel?

i don't know any more....

ALL I KNOW is ABOUT NUMB!!!

i'm so so so sick....
okie gonna go sleep liao...
tired...
haiss...

wat i really think about is ones doesn't really know wat is L.O.V.E
but one day he will understand it... but not now...

but i guess towards working stuff... he will be like damn f'ing serious...

2008-12-17T20:08:00.002+08:00

okie this fews days has been damn freaking sick....

just now went to see doc...

backaching is due to the fall thingys...
fever is due to bladder infection...

what's with zouk out..

one words BORING!~

zzz....

guess wat the doc told me...

he say normally whether guys or ladies...
won't tolerate for too long but i did it 4 days some more.. wahaha...

zzzz....

nonsense!!!

I"M SO SO SO SICK...

argH!!!

btw

thanks to ones for ytd and the day before ytd night for taking care of me.....

was having extremely fever...

ones helps me with everything when i'm like totally sick...

feed me with porridge lohz...

but one bad things is
"i was begin laugh when i got teased..."

LIFE JUST AIN'T THAT "SUI"!!!!

2008-12-16T10:05:00.002+08:00

WHATEVER she wanna believe who or not... not my business anymore... i F'ING HATE this place.... gonna save up very soon to MOVE OUT OF HERE ASAP!!!!

BTW why i changed my link... due to PERSONAL REASON so pls....

RE-LINK ME !!!!

MESSAGE TO "Ones"

Each n every one has their own limits...
I will still be standing beside you regardless of everything...
maybe i want is just too simple u may think it's silly...
i'm already F'ing hack care everything...
All i wan is to hope u know who the really one to love you...

i'm really stupid n silly to have this thoughts...
but however... i hope u would understand what am i thinking....

haiss...

-------------------------------------------------------------

why is everything giving me problem.....

FUCK IT....

I SIMPLY PISSED OFF WITH ONE PERSON... AND THAT THE PERSON WHO GAVE MY NUMBER AWAY...

2008-12-15T19:53:00.002+08:00

omg.. i confess each n every single things i had to...

it's really up to ones to believe or not....

i simply love ones... but i just want it that simple...

but ones can't give...

ones thinks that i'm still childish...

watever yesh! i am... but.... can anyone think back....

that's all wat girls want to simple that a guy can't give....

2008-12-15T00:53:00.002+08:00

will link you guys when i'm free promised...

i'm sicked.....

back aching n fever n gastric n ankle pain...

who can be much more worst den me...

will updated my post later... stay tune.. for news n whinning session as always

2008-12-12T11:11:00.002+08:00

Speed is gradually BACK.

it's been a long time after their last debut...

past history of SPEED.

this a few songs i'm in love with..
haha=)))
enjoy

today gonna go changi airport work. help my sis for her events. work as wat? Tequilla girls lohz... zzz... okie... u will be seeing a puipui girl walking here and there....

AND

THAT WILL BE

ME

IMISSBRENDAGOH
&&&
IMISSVANGELINE

DISAPPOINTMENT

2008-12-12T02:36:00.003+08:00

I THOUGHT

AS BEING A FREN(real good sis)

should support their fren in everything
no method of right and wrong..

only try to advice but not to ask them to do as they said...

Honestly it's all about disappointment...

end up i'll still have to get a not close fren to listen to all my whinning...

haiss... are my real frens DEAD!

2008-12-11T20:23:00.002+08:00

happy birthday to samson!!!

11 dec

ones is very pissed off with me due to 10 dec night...

ones' loses his wallet due to my fault...

ones' loses his face i think due to my fault...

is it ones' starts to get sicked of me liao...

haiss...... that ponders me ALOTS

haiss...

i must cut down or stop something very soon if not my health gone.....

AM I ABLE TO STOP ONES' FROM DOING SOMETHING???

2008-12-11T17:16:00.002+08:00

10 dec night

totally sucks...

jitao cannot remember anything when i'm out side there......

2008-12-10T10:17:00.003+08:00

haha... seriously this is a joke....

went out with a girl again... dun ask me how i know i just get to know...

named XXXX XXX

still asked ppl lied to me... sui...

even simon still help him cover....

yes! should i be f'ing happy or wat... so FOR FUCK.... i must give a damn to be diam diam...

than hao lohz... u do this i do that lohz....

pissed me off to the max...

eventually wanted to listen to ones words but now...

if i honestly listen i would only find myself fucking S.S( STUPID &&& SILLY)...

where everyone is helping him to cover up...

why should i fucking listen to him....

A LEOPARD CANNOT CHANGES IT'S SPOT....

~~KNNBCCBLJL~~.....

G vs B

2008-12-09T20:44:00.003+08:00

hmm..

out of sudden i dun feel quite really good...

ask me why...

okie.. i'll tell you...

out of sudden i feel that someone's back...

snatch snatch snatch....

i scared ones' will be gone...

and

for the interview i got it.... haPPY!! =))))

so today there's good n bad news....

2008-12-08T18:48:00.002+08:00

happy birthday to my dearest joy joy... i'm realy damn sorry for everything.... i shall make it up another.. i know u are totally pissed off to the max....

when for an interview today...

shall wait for tml result...

although i heard alots of things... but but but... i have a highly doubt that will not happen.... even if i really want to wait for everything... but doesn't mean it would really happens... there are too much things one's seem like hiding away from me... though everyone has their own privacy... and we shouldn't invade others privacy too... but my curiou-sity is pushing to e corner... shit!!! must control... but i scared that my limit will go off easily...

dear god, am i really changing to another person soon...

if can change pls dun change me... could u change another person to a very good guy n a gd bf to be...

(*dreaming.... i am dreaming... i have alots of worries... all on my own.... ooooooo!!!)

okie... i'm not a christian... but to times i really hope they would hear my prayers........

AND

F.R.E.E T.H.I.N.K.E.R
over here

2008-12-07T09:47:00.003+08:00

this picture is like freaking chio loh... but it will be extremely pain... lol... haha.... but i dun think i will do it say say nia... but honestly got the real urge to do it....

but too bad i'm not so into nike..

W.H.Y

because

NIKE - JUST DO IT

OKAY!!

it sounds freaking LAME SHIT..

watever it is ...

i just know i'm starving like hell... why nobody cares... sick plus hungry..

status: D.Y.I.N.G

where is ones???

gone with char bo again???

or really celebrating...

found a small partial of my answer: D.R.I.N.K.I.N.G

utterly disappointed....

~~can someone guide me....~~
where out of sudden i know that there's actually no one who can guide me thru
BUT
myself

LoL...

whinning is all i know..

2008-12-06T20:15:00.002+08:00

wondering why ones' can't only keep itself to only one person..

have to make it complicated...

does ones need more den a love...

why need to know more ladies....

why...

i seriously dun understand... why i keep asking myself... or is it ones keep finding due to it's loves one doens't give ones enough loves.. or ones just need alots of loves to fulfill itself... hmmm... been pondering for quite along time...

question was asked but answer it all about

L.I.E.S

when will ones really be A.W.A.K.E!!!

can ones love one wait for that long and what about ones love one tolerance?

can she be that patience as right now...

i really wonder and ponders...

but if someone asked me this question again...

Which is more blessed, loving someone or begin loved by someone?

my answer would always be the same loving someone...

what if i still find out things happen again... right now i would say i would give up... but eventually i know i won't.. but maybe have to force myself down... like holding a gun to my head and pull the trigger den off it goes.."BANG!~" a shot done and it's gone... lol....

LILING BULLSHIT!~

will uploads some photos later...

2008-12-06T19:04:00.002+08:00

out of sudden i feel like pierce my tongue and putting tattoo on my back waist.. got the urge manz... but i must control myself..

to

B.E.H.A.V.E...

omg... got fetishy over tattoo and piercing out of no where...

lang cheng di....
(canto)
冷静

LoL....

GLL is going C.R.A.Z.Y!!!

2008-12-05T18:37:00.004+08:00

DELETED everything...

Too sick to quarrel with other over nonsense thingys..

alright back to my clean blog...

one more thing i don't wish to see u tagging at my n my cousin n his friend blog anymore... if not i would realy post everything up and handle those msg u send over into my fone to the police... take it or not... try to be funny again..

u will get it no kidding.....

this mornign had a fight with him... zzz... fight over wat... haha... i also too bo liao... everyday keep asking him today got get girls number a not... i asked becoz i f'ing care right if not u think i f'ing care if i dun L.O.V.E him...

anyway, from right now onwards i f'ing swear i won't bothers anymore... if he really treasures me, i will definelty behave myself truely towards him.. but he don't so do i... i won;t be like the past me... whether good or bad... i f'ing care....

LoL!!! tat's ME...

GLL

happy bday to teck.....

WHITE CHRISTMAS

I'm dreaming of a white christmas,
just like the ones I used to know
Where the treetops glisten and children listen
to hear sleigh bells in the snow

I'm dreaming of a white christmas,
just like the ones I used to know
Where the treetops glisten and children listen
to hear sleigh bells in the snow

I'm dreaming of a white christmas,
with every christmas card I write
May your days be merry and bright,
and may all your christmases be white

I'm dreaming of a white christmas,
just like the ones I used to know
May your days be merry and bright,
and may all your christmases be white

I'm dreaming of a white christmas,
with every christmas card I write
May your days be merry and bright,
and may all your christmases be white

May your days be merry and bright,
and may all your christmases be white

And may all your christmases be white (All your christmases be white)
And may all your christmases be white (All your christmases be white)
And may all your christmases be
(All your christmases be white)
(All your christmases be white)

2008-12-02T18:12:00.001+08:00

anyway christmas coming....

in advance merry christmas to everyone...

White Christmas - White Christmas

2008-12-02T01:50:00.002+08:00

had enough of nonsense...

today fucking sick... fever headache bodyache cough n flu... i think i really caught a flu at sentosa liao...

been sleeping the whole day n night n wake up blog a while den of to sleep again... think if the guy continue to give me all those shit i think i gonna burn my heADs off... no mood 39.8 sweet ... anyway... off to my dreams again.....

2008-12-01T19:55:00.005+08:00

Anyway,

Leng happy 22nd birthday to you... don't always be that stress lahz... u must take care and remember to eat manz... i bet we should really meet up some day before you fly.. LoL.... charbo arhz... i got long long long long long long story to tell you manz....

2008-12-01T11:04:00.003+08:00

Guys i'm sicked again...

early in the morning i got pissed of by some rubbish...

an indian guy i just knew not long after so as in social of coz i will meet up with friends... but the prob is

i went to zirca and i saw alots of my frens i haven't been seeing them for years...

2008-11-28T16:26:00.003+08:00

saw wilson and xiuping last night...

it's was a crazy night after all...

what can i do to make me more sober....

我的心实在乱

什么是真什么是假！

我不知道！！！

我不想去喝酒让自己跟沉醉

可是没办法！！！

我好狠我自己！！！

FUCK YOU!!!

my head n thoughts all in mess can someone packed it up for me?

2008-11-26T01:34:00.003+08:00

Just another borign that passed...

after work meet up with yiying....

drinking session...

singha!!!<<< er xin just liek jolly shandy but with lesser gas that all....

hekineken!!! 2 bottle....

after that met up with my fren danneth... it's been a year plus ever since we really met up.. haha....

so chit chat lohz...

3rd day of NEW BEGINNINGs???

2008-11-25T00:38:00.004+08:00

OH WELL!!!

AN UPDATED POST is begin POSTED UP!!! (WAILENG see i post it up for you liao...)

HAHA!!

okie!!! back to the same old me... living in a world of minez again... dun have to bother nor to worry about things anymore... good good... oh well... i dun really know wat to say...

but got a special msg to someone special that's (果果)(she's not a fruit or animal but a human name like that okie!)(f there's ppl anyhow things or talk rubbish will get slap by me....

你要真真的去向你到底要什么。。。什么为你好！我们女的要好好爱自己！！！如果真的值得你去爱他就只好慢慢的等。。可是你也要知道等不代表已停会有结果。。。也有可能到头来什么都没有!!! 所以要想清楚，因为没人可比你跟清楚。。。

omg!!! i wanna go club i wann go hoiday someone nice can sponser me... i will love till that person GONE DEAD!!!! LOL...

LAME SHIT.....

okie my blog still suckss gonna do somethign soon....

and one more thing...

my dearest cousin i would be free on that day... we shall make CHEEHOW SUFFER... LOL€..... WAHAHA.... BTW CHEEHOW TREATING EVERYONE!!!!!!!!!!!

SIANZ STILL HAD TO GO WORK!!!! LIFE SUCKS.......................................

I HATE GOSSIPERS!!!!!!

=)))

2008-11-21T21:13:00.001+08:00

everything ended.

i'm fine no worries...

my dear frenz

don't have to worry about me.

dun wish to think everything anymore...

Hurray! Hurray! Hurray!

Live my life to the fullest...

the un-reveal secrets.....s

2008-11-20T21:50:00.003+08:00

*sigh

i know i fucking stupid...

they are still together...

seriously than what am i?

a scandal?

i dunno....

what am i to him....

why i know everything still wanna continue....

why like that i hate my life...

why i still wnna continue just to make myself sink even deeper...

i dun even dare to tell ppl... LoL<<< this is a joke.....

He's just another heart breaker....

but i still wanna let him hurt...

FUCK YOU GLL.....

PLEASE WAKE UP!!!

the whinning continues

2008-11-20T10:27:00.006+08:00

ytd night went dining with KHWS @tampines for teppanyaki.....

after that headed home than went to the pump room with friends then straight to arena after that.....

the pump room was cool n a good place to chill out...

ytd night the arena was fun...

seriously i really feeling like crying out loud now.... it's all about debating... i'm really having extremely disappointment... wat to do.... he left me with lots of question that not begin answered....

Is that difficult to love someone with ur whole heart.... or just to focus on one?

how i wish he could answer my question truefully.....

begin 看开的人并不容易。。。

sigh!

someoneisatsomewhereatsomeplacedoingsomething.

2008-11-20T09:41:00.003+08:00

Looks like someone gone MIA again... whatever it is... i was told by someone that someone went back to somewhere to do someone stuff.... but it's hard to believe liao.... someone hasn't called me since someone reach some places.

haiss.. utterly disappointed... Does someone lied to me again... in fact someone din really when to some place but went to "someothers" house... i really dun know any more... being magnanmious is getting harder as days passed... i jux wish that someone could really stop everything that someone is doing.... sianz de..... haiss.........

or perhaps i should say this someone just can't stop the habit anymore... so only one choice is to continue...say past times is past time but someone is still doing everything same as before....

FUCK UP!!!
i got real FLARE UP!!!!

FUCK

2008-11-19T17:50:00.002+08:00

i hate someone truely with my heart.... everything so last mintues... asked him go back do what... he just doesn't seems want to say... nice... how sweet right... one word...

FUCK YOU!

FYHWS!!!

i serious got damned pekche at the moment... i honestly got tons of dirtywords gonna spill through my mouth... a msg say going back and nvr ask abt anything just like tat... do u know what is CALL FUCKING PISSED OFF...

WHATEVER IT IS....

tell me to behave myself why don't he look at the mirror himself who's the one that isn't behaving himself well enough! and i asked what if i dun behave myself....
answer KHWS reply: Try me lo. Don't let me find out lo...
seriously i'm the one who find things out. i know what's happening around... but why arhz... guys can do it why not girls....... haiss.... life is freaking bad... till now every minutes or even seconds i may think that u are contacting with ___________.

haiss... bo bian being magnanmious is when i still can tolerate.... but when it erupts suddenly.... meaning i need to whin.... haiss... but i dare to say till now i nvr did anything that 对不起 him de lohz...

haiss whin whin whin.....

WHIN

2008-11-19T02:25:00.002+08:00

thanks joy joy for my belated present... i love the vcd n cup... i will keep it.. but i won;t use it...

thanks brenda for the small purse.... =))) i loving it...

i try to make myself happy but after so long and again... i felt utterly speechless again... nice right... it's hard to walk this path.. but i still insisting to go on this path... i will regret in future.. but for now.. i still can slowly cope with it... haiss.... bad life..... can't blame i choose it myself... so again n again i can't blame ppl... i had to pay for my own price... my own consquences... haiss.... life is as just bad as everythign... but still will live happily.... coz it's better to live each n everyday with smile... and most important!!!

LIVE TO THE FULLEST IN MY LIFE...

mooch mooch myself...

liling say angela u must hang on there... jia you.. love you... (MUST love myself)

How to make one's urs as in begin truefully to one person...

2008-11-18T18:09:00.003+08:00

hmm... so fast time really flies again... begin magnanmious for 16 days le... wahaha.... din know i can do it... haiss... and looks like someone gone MIA again... fone off... so does it means that someone go find or meet some other ppl already.. haha... i dunno... doesn't really matters... just which to know whether tonight are we dinning together that's all... but it's seem like i leave with a word dunno again... zzz i hate it...

6.20pm- called again!!! finally a pick up liao.. oh well at least can reach someone... LoL...

In a Rs, there would be always good n bad times...

a Rs needs trust n begin honest to each other...

a Rs must also have bond... if both doesn't have it...

=

nothing.

right now not begin emo ah... but logical ways....

sat when to temple to pray with GY.....
and guan ying ma answered to my prayers...

question i've asked is also begin answered...

guess i really know the way n count come... but still wanna continue...

One's get DRUNK, still wanna continue to go even much more deeper DRUNK

jitao is sweet!...

and one more thing.... i'm superly damned tired... dozing off soon..... omg!!!! so tiring......

UNDER REVAMPING!!!

2008-11-17T00:29:00.006+08:00

Guys my blog still under construction... if see anything or mis-alignment let me know ya.... for the link i will re- link some coz i lost some contacts.... LoL....
maybe will change my background... haha..... =)))

okie today went out to BUGIS... thanks to SOMEONE for the lunch @ V8...

next after that meet up with him @ PS...

THANKS JOY JOY for the present!!! LOVE YA.....

taken some photo again.... wahaha...

me &&& boi aka pig aka bartender aka clown

2008-11-16T14:48:00.001+08:00

after reading someone blog wo de ganchu hen shen... den i notice... i'm fortunate as in i'm still not married... hmm....

btw my blog under construction.... designing it again...

=)

2008-11-13T23:13:00.003+08:00

Being happy doesn't means everything is being perfect.

It means you've decided to look beyond the imperfection.

after being utterly disappointed
came to this decision.

6 days of being magnanimous.(trying hard)

when angela meets joy

2008-11-13T10:57:00.002+08:00

Finally me and joy joy pic is up!!!!

LOVE JOY so much....

2008-11-11T03:23:00.004+08:00

oh wells i decided to 看开了。。。
no use of begin that pathetic to myself... must be strong since this is the path i chose than i should be strong enough to meet all sort of things... nice right... haha....

okie i shall stay clam n wait n observe... alright...

btw ytd night just talk to my uncle... coz a few weeks ago i left him a skype message ask him to contact me once he sees it.. so eventually i got it... i told him about going over to china to work or perhaps euro... and guess wat he says... he will help me check... and if possible i will be going over to china next year... omg!! kinda anxious over it now... though i wanted to continue to study but i guess work first is the best thingys after all.. haha... hopefully it's a yesh....

anyway, these few days gonna thanks to zy for accompany me.. weelong for the advice n his logic.. but i guess i had causes him a bit prob with his gf... but hope they both can see this i sincerely apologise for it.. xiaowei for acc me chit chat when i'm really down.... u guys are great best friends or buddy ever....

as for the guy... even though i know so much things... disappointment n saddness i may had... but i'll try to trust u... even though tonight the msg i dunno u really send it wrongly and who the she is.. i already dun wish to know... but just hope... u can ends every single bullshit n rubbish u did.... i dun wish for the best but at least u clear the prob i've been seeing it... at least u tel me u clear whether it's a lie or not... just dun let me find out more things that will extremely do it...

lastly i had to say is i lurve u but not with my whole heart...

my dear all friends.... thanks for the cares n concern over me.... i'm really glad... i lurve you guys n girls...

especially msg left for ting n may n ivan or perhaps pearlyn...

will try to link up u girls soon okie....
(as the lazy bug still inside me will get the hell lost out of me)will be greatly appreciated...

gd morning snd nights...

alright of to my sleep first working later nights....

QUOTE: LIVE MY LIFE TO THE FULLEST...

2008-11-09T21:53:00.002+08:00

我决定把通通都当做没发生过。。。
做一个大方的人。。。
我已不想再去多想了。。。
我只希望你能对我

两个字

“坦诚”

你能吗？

2008-11-09T05:25:00.003+08:00

i guess i choose to gamble one last time... i choose to hack care n trust him one last time... i guesss i'm sily n stupid but i just wanna go with it....

most silly ger in the world2

2008-11-09T04:54:00.002+08:00

nice within one night i found out so many so many things and there's too much loopholes in it... thanks.... oh well... what am i gonna do with it.... HA! i'm just stupid..... nice nice.... =))) honestly speaking i hate myself......